Whatever you are going through, the Lord knows how to help you, and he delights in being invited to be part of your life. When others don't know or understand all that you face, the Lord knows and is waiting for you to ask and invite him into your life and challenges. In Him, we find our life's answers and joy. The moments that make you wonder what good could ever come of this, God will make something good out of it. He is amazing at weaving our life story into something beautiful.
Part of why I write is because I need reminders of God's love. In the working, waiting, and praying for God's help, it helps to remember that the Lord has always come through. Every time!
My disclaimer is that we are a regular family with plenty of ordinary problems. There is nothing special about us, other than that God loves us, like He loves you- and it is an amazing kind of love. His love is there for you and me, He never wavers. I tell of his miracles because I know He has been there for us and will be there again.
When our daughter who needed several surgeries was 3 years old, an herb started growing in our yard, outside our front door. This beautiful rosette was special I could tell, but I didn't know what plant it was. That summer on an herb walk, I learned this was mullein, and one of its uses is to help the conditions our daughter was born with. I was so thankful the Lord put it there, right outside our door for us to learn about and use. Not many herbs taste good, most are bitter, and she was a toddler asserting her independence on what she would eat. Babies with special needs come with a fighter spirit, and she definitely had that. I knew giving her an herb by mouth wouldn't work. I asked the Lord how to use the mullein and he told me I could put the herb in her bath, and pray for it to help her. She had a bath every day after her medical care. My daughter and I collected a soft mullein leaf and a few flowers for bath time a few times a week, it was like a little toy boat to her. I would kneel outside of the bathtub and thank the Lord for her, for His love, for the mullein, and ask the Lord to help her fully enjoy all the good things in life. Without me saying anything, our daughter would kneel in the water, and join her little hands to mine as I prayed. This continued for a year or two, and I believe it did help. Bathtime prayers were special. Recently, I was on another herb walk and the teacher said putting herbs in baths is one of the best ways to give children herbs. I smiled, because that's what the Lord told me to do with the mullein years ago, I had not heard it taught anywhere else before. I will return to the mullein and the bathtime prayers toward the end of this story.
When our daughter was first born, she needed some medical tubing, it had to stay in place for the first year. If it was pulled out, it would mean a visit to the emergency room at the children's hospital. After the surgery where the tubing was placed the day she was born, one doctor saw the picture of our family taped to her incubator. He said, "She has 5 brothers and one sister?! You're going to have to figure out a way to keep that tubing safe!" Each nurse seemed to have a different idea of how to take care of the tubing. Contradicting suggestions from the nurses about how to handle the tubing, let me know that this was rare enough, they didn't really know. A nurse reassured us, "You will figure this out." Tucking the tubing into a zippered pajama during the cold winter months when she wasn't mobile yet worked. But summer was around the corner and footsie pajamas wouldn't work in hot weather. Praying about how to keep the medical tubing secure and safe in summer temperatures kept me up many nights. I wanted her to be able to enjoy the outdoors in the summer, along with the rest of our family and prayed to know what to do.
One day as I was pulling clothes out of the dryer, and holding a onesie in my hand, the Lord gave me the idea to add a pocket to a onesie, they were already a part of her clothing. For a couple days, I thought about adding a pocket to a onesie, it would need to be secure, with something like snaps, but also soft, stretchy, and breathable. A few days later, again while doing laundry, I felt the Lord show me that if the bottom part of a onesie was cut up and sewn to make a pocket, the snaps would serve as the secure opening/closing of the pocket and keep the tubing in place. We made a pocket, sewed the pocket onto another onesie, and it worked. With 7 children, we had a lot of onesies, so I wouldn't need to buy anything. The pocket onesies became her everyday clothing. I was beyond thankful for the Lord's help, I knew the idea had 100% come from Him! Our baby was getting more active and figuring out how to grab and pull on things like the tubing. The pocket onesies worked great, it helped me feel at ease about our many children holding our baby, and the tubing never got pulled out accidentally. When other people didn't know what would work, the Lord knew and helped us. He does that over and over again for us. What a loving Father he is!
Our church friends and family helped us make pocket onesies for the different sizes she would need as she grew quickly that first year. Every day when I put her clothes on her, I remembered that Heavenly Father had helped us figure things out and that our friends had helped us. After the first year and a half, she no longer needed tubing or special clothing, she had gone through the repair surgeries. Fast forward a couple years, the parent support group at our children's hospital was making gift baskets for new parents of children with similar conditions. The surgeon's office asked if we would bring a few of the pocket onesies for the new parent baskets. My wonderful neighbor helped me make them this time. I put butterflies on them, with the words "hope" and "love" on the butterfly wings.
The day when we were finishing the onesies, for our daughter's bathtime prayer, where we put mullein leaves in the bathwater, we prayed for the new babies with similar conditions. As I thought of the new babies and families, I remembered what we had been through and knew the new families would face many of the same challenges. Learning about diagnoses we had never heard of before, and hoping our little baby would be able to still have a good life. Scary infections, difficulties with dressing changes, ordering and praying for boxes of medical supplies to arrive before we ran out, many hours on the phone arguing with insurance over medical bills, multiple surgeries and hospital stays, and taking care of our children at home while we were at the hospital, it felt overwhelming many times. Family relationships would change out of necessity, and work demands would have to be adjusted. Very little would be smooth sailing. Only the Lord knew how to get through it all. The Lord helped us in many little and big miracles. He got us through it- every single worry was taken care of and more. The Lord will take care of these new babies and their families, as he has taken care of us. Our daughter saw my tears flowing freely into the bathwater as we prayed for the new families and their babies. The tears were for what the new families and babies had ahead of them, and also tears for what we had been through. She began pouring drops of the bathwater mixed with my tears on top of my head, holding her little hands on the top of my head as if she were giving me a blessing. Silently, without saying a word, she held her wet hands on my head for several seconds. After her bath was done, I was folding the onesies and praying again. For a split second, I saw these babies as spirits coming to earth. These children had the effect of an explosion of light and love. It was like an atomic bomb powerfully rippling outward in all directions with beautiful light, love, and clarity. Their willingness to face their specific challenges brought so much light to everyone around them. That love and light washed over me, and I felt a deep, deep peace. The Lord is working in the challenges, they are not in vain. Even in the overwhelming difficulties, He is working in our favor. He took all my worries, grief, and frustration- and replaced them with his deep peace that everything would work out, and He would take care of us. A knowing that He had been there for us, loving us through every difficulty replaced any sorrow and tension I had felt.
Later that same day of the bath time prayer for other babies like our child, we were put on pre-evacuation alert. Forest fires close to our home were growing rapidly, and by afternoon it was a mandatory evacuation. We had a few hours- that was a big blessing. Some people in the path of wildfires only have a few minutes. We gathered our children, and a few belongings, along with the special onesies and medical supplies, and evacuated our home that afternoon. The peace the Lord gave me earlier in the day carried me. My normal reaction would be fear and stress, but the Lord helped me understand He would take care of us as He has in the past. He knew what I needed before I did. I felt unusually calm as we gathered our family and drove away from our home with the eery darkness of smoke and fire growing on the mountain behind us. I have wondered since if loving and praying for others is part of having Jesus' peace.
It was interesting watching our neighborhood pack up, some of the people that we thought would be in a panic were peaceful, while others were understandably so overwhelmed. During the 10-day fire evacuation, there were still moments of worry, but the Lord took care of us 100%, and every need was met. Our family was so kind, generous, and willing to help. One of my sisters bravely drove over to help us pack up and evacuate. Another sister thoughtfully bought a birthday cake and pizza to celebrate my son's birthday which was that very day. We stayed at my parent's home and we felt in their kindness the Lord's love. The timing worked out, they were on vacation. My brother took time off his busy work and family schedule and brought us dinner. Friends and family I hadn't heard from for years called to see if we were OK and offer help. We were so thankful for the firefighters who stayed behind and fought the fires. There were miracles in the fires too, the fires didn't advance and destroy our little town as they could have. The wind was blowing towards our town, and there were plenty of dry trees and fuel in the path of the fire but somehow the fire turned away from our town- it was a miracle. The prayers of our community were answered. We came back 10 days later, expecting severe smoke damage, but were surprised to find everything was OK. We changed the air filters and vacuumed the carpets, but our home was OK. The mountaintop where the fire stopped unexpectedly was renamed Miracle Mountain.
During the evacuation, we were the recipients of much love from neighboring communities- they donated all kinds of items for the evacuees- towels, food, water bottles, hygiene items, and even pet food. There was a warehouse full of donated goods, organized like a store- with aisles, and pallets loaded with useful items. We were doing OK, but our neighbors told us we had to go see the donation center. When we arrived, we were welcomed by volunteers, who gave my husband and I a shopping cart, and asked us to please fill it up. It was a sacred feeling to see so many donations from our neighboring communities and to be on the receiving end of their love. We took food, toilet paper, and towels- which we had forgotten to pack. I have two cousins who lost their homes to forest fires. My heart goes out to those whose homes were in the path of forest fires that did not stop, whose homes were destroyed, despite the prayers, and the love present, and who are still rebuilding several years later. These are life changing events for sure.
We don't know why things happen, but we know that in the end, God works the challenges to bless us. He is there- in every challenge, in every trial. He never leaves us alone! Even in the difficulties He is working to bless us. Praise God for his wonderful love and care! There aren't enough words to tell how wonderful and loving our Jesus is! Have you felt the Lord carrying you in your trials?
