A few months ago, I was thinking about all the chaos in the world. I was worried if our family would be OK through all that is unfolding. Many more of the events prophesied in the scripture are still to come, part of the cleansing process readying the earth and his people for the Lord's return. I asked the Lord to be with us through the current trials and those still to come. The Lord told me something I have thought about over and over again. The Lord asked me, "Where were you when your child was in the hospital for surgeries?" I thought back, I was with her the whole time she was in the hospital for her surgeries. I could not leave her side when she needed me most. He told me that is how he feels about me. He will not leave me alone when I need him most. He asked me to pray, think of Him, and read his words so that his spirit will be with me. What a blessing to know He will be closest to us, and not leave our side when our needs are the greatest. What a loving Heavenly Father, Heavenly Mother and Savior we have. It was a new concept to me- that they are helping me because that is who they are. They are full of love for us, their children. I can do better in thinking of the Lord more, praying more, and reading his words more.
"Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you. Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are continually before me." Isaiah 49:15-16 ESV
When things are noisy or chaotic in my home, I go sit outside for a minute. Seeing the sky, the clouds, the trees and God's creations helps me to remember God's love and that he is in charge. I have been enjoying watching the bees in our yard and garden. The bees love the miniature white flowers shaped in a cluster on top of the mint plants, they are the perfect size for the bees tiny mouths to drink nectar from. Bees have a calming hum, it is like music. They fly or dance with a graceful motion, and they purposefully fly directly to the center of the flowers, to feed on the nectar. Wasps are erratic in their flight and not centered on the flower. Wasps will land anywhere on a plant and eat anything- the leaves, the nectar, even other insects. They are very different than the bees that only eat nectar. For us, Jesus is the center. He is the nectar, the sweetness. If we take a lesson from the bees, we nourish ourselves with Jesus' love- it is the sweetest, most meaningful and long-lasting nourishment. Jesus is the embodiment of our Heavenly Parents love for us, his sacrifice and life given willingly for us. Jesus' amazing love and grace for us is the sweetness we long for, and He gives meaning to our lives. There are many things we can try to nourish ourselves with- but only Jesus fills our heart's longing. My moments with Him are the best moments of my day. His words are food for my soul. How much of what I let into my life is distracting or preventing me from going to the Lord for comfort and nourishment?
One more story with our child with medical needs- she spends more time with me because of her medical needs but I love all of my children and they have each taught me invaluable lessons. She made a game for me, hiding little post-it notes with drawings on them. She hid them in my closet in funny places- under stacks of folded clothing, by my shoes, in the bed linens that are folded up. She wanted me to find all the post-it notes, they were supposed to lead me to one very special post-it note with a message. The very special post-it note had a message "I love you Mom" with a little stick figure drawing of me. She was so happy as I found her hidden notes, and loved seeing my surprise as I found them. She gave me a big hug when I found them. I am still finding her post-it notes in my closet.
Hang on to that thought about the post-it notes with an "I love you" written on them, I will come back to it in a minute. On my first blog post, I told a little of our story and how the Lord has been teaching us. I wrote that the more I know about the Lord Jesus, the more I want to know. How did he give his life with so much love and forgiveness, even in his last moments? Why did he do that for us? How did he have the strength to do what he did? What is it that makes him happy? What breaks his heart?
As time has passed, the Lord has answered my questions, a little at a time. The Lord told me one thing that breaks his heart is when we don't see all the gifts of love he has put around us. When we don't see his love for us. All around us are little messages of love, reminding us that Jesus loves us. Like my child's post-it notes. How often do we walk right by special blessings and gifts of love from Jesus without noticing or thanking him for them? Look around you when you step outside. Look at the blue sky covering the earth- that is his love that covers you and me. Look at the clouds that give shade from the sun and water for the earth- that is also his love. The trees, plants, everything around us testifies of Jesus' love for us. Nature testifies of our Heavenly Father and Mother's love and Jesus.
As I think back to the times when we were in the hospital with our child, there were blessings all around us, and the sweetness of the Lord's help was felt more than I'd ever experienced it before, even though she went through very difficult things. In thinking of the challenges ahead in preparation for the Second Coming, I look forward to more closeness with the Lord. Knowing that He will be with us takes away the fear.
One of my favorite scriptures is "I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up." D&C 84:88. This was given to missionaries who were going out to teach, but also applies to us when we are on the Lord's errand.
How has the Lord blessed you and shown his love to you? Am I looking for the messages of love around me from our Heavenly Parents and Jesus? Dear Lord, help me to see you. To see your love for me. Open my eyes, my ears to hear you. Clear my mind of worry that I can remember your words that are sweet like honey. Please be with me through what lies ahead.
One of my children made this card one year, and it reminds me of Jesus' love for us. "My hands are full of love for you" it reads, with flowers on the hands a heart in the middle.
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